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10 Reasons Why Fall Out Boy is Better than the Beatles

Written By: ReadJunk Staff
Shocking as it may seem, not every music journalist thinks the Beatles were the greatest band to grace the earth. Frankly, we at ReadJunk find them to be overrated in every possible way, especially compared to some of today’s excellent bands. Perhaps we took the easy way by choosing Fall Out Boy, whose music is simply incredible. But as journalists, we don’t just look at music, but the age and context in which it’s written, as well as other stuff. So here are 10 reasons why Fall Out Boy is bette
r than the Beatles.


#10. Band Name
I admit this is a superficial way to start the list, but that’s why it’s #10. Yet this is a good point. Fall Out Boy is a Simpsons reference, it sounds cool, and it’s descriptive. The Beatles is just a bad pun. And I mean BAD PUN. Like, ska band bad.

#9. Haircuts
Yeah, I guess The Beatles were well known for their moptops, but those guys were in desperate need of hiring a hair stylist. I mean, come on, this was the '60s. I'll bet those hippies didn't shower or bathe for days on end. Not so for Fall Out Boy! They're clean and yet rugged - not to mention cool facial hair and muttonchops! And if you’re a girl, you GOTTA love the way Pete Wentz parts his hair. No contest, here.

#8. Exposure
Ringo was on Shining Time Station. Pete Wentz' penis was on the Internet. No competition.

#7. The Internet
It doesn't take a rocket scientist to realize that Fall Out Boy is far more connected with their fans than The Beatles ever were. There's no better evidence of this truth than the way they handle themselves on the internet. Fall Out Boy (especially the charismatic Pete Wentz) constantly blog and acquire meaningful friendships with their fans on websites like MySpace.com and Flicker. I don't think anyone can argue that The Beatles ever cared this much about their fans, but were just in it to get paid. You never saw Paul or Ringo blog about their relationships and touring and people they care about. Maybe The Beatles answered the odd fan mail letter or two, but seriously who uses snail mail when you could blog to your fans and post some videos on YouTube? Wow, way to harness your creative energy, guys.

#6. Artistic Collaboration
The Beatles weren't exactly with the times when they were making records. In fact, they had to struggle constantly to keep up with the trends during the '60s. Thankfully, the same can't be said for Fall Out Boy. They're always in touch with many different types of music and styles and always work with the hippest of people. Case in point is their latest album and no doubt their most awesome collaborator: Jay-Z. Jigga himself takes a break from managing Def Jam records to record a brief intro reppin' his homies, FOB, and giving a middle-finger to all the hataz: this includes YOU, Beatles! Leave it to FOB to get jiggy with it. You never saw The Beatles make any cutting-edge collaborations, right? Besides, who did they have to chill with? Bob Dylan? Pleeeeease.

#5. Better Politics
Fall Out Boy's politics are more interesting and mainstream. They're totally against the war and stuff like that, while the Beatles sang about killing people, like Rocky Raccoon and Buffalo Bill shooting people, and that “Happiness in a Warm Gun” song. Oh, and Maxwell beating children with hammers. The Beatles were downright bloodthirsty. Lame.

#4. Modern Relevance
Besides geriatrics with tubes in their face, who remembers the Beatles? Sure, they're slightly more known than, say, The Hollys and Strawberry Alarm Clock, but who has given a rat's ass about the Beatles in the past 30 years? Not even the Beatles give a rat's ass about the Beatles. I mean, the band sold their songs to Michael Jackson. Talk about not giving a shit about your music anymore. So why should anyone else?

#3. Lyrics
The Beatles were simplistic to the point of cartoony. Unless you're Raffi, you shouldn't be singing about walruses and yellow submarines. FOB, on the other hand, deliver mature and astute lyrics about the important and relatable complexity of everyday life. The Beatles' lyrics are a color-by-number set for crayons, while FOB paint a multi-textured, masterful portrait of the human condition.

#2. Cultural Importance
There is no doubt that the Beatles were popular in their time. They had a few #1 hits, and they were good at merchandising with lunchboxes and such. But the Beatles didn't change the world. Meanwhile, FOB has not only changed and recharged the face of music, they have become a cultural phenomenon, the effects of which will be felt for decades. We may not even be experiencing the full impact now, but it's obvious that historians will point to FOB as the moment when music became a driving force for our generation, if not the entire 21st century.

#1. Musical Output
We've all heard the phrase "quality, not quantity." That phrase has never been more accurate and applicable than in the comparison between the Beatles and Fall Out Boy. During The Beatles' limited recording output of 6 or so years, they released something like 300 albums (well, it felt that way, at least), and they were all rife with filler, album after album after album. These guys really needed an editor! Where was George Martin to curb all their self-indulgent sitar and psychedelic influences? To be generous, The Beatles only had maybe 3 or 4 worthwhile songs to choose from in all those albums. Meanwhile, with Fall Out Boy, they show restraint and their fans are all the more thankful for this. Thus far, they've only released 4 albums in their 6-year existence and they waste no time when it comes to dishing out quality. When it comes down to it, "Sugar We're Going Down" is a more culturally significant song about love and teenage angst than "All You Need Love" could ever accomplish. CASE CLOSED.
 
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(29) Comments | Post A Comment  
Comments:
FOB
Posted on: February 3rd 2008. Posted by: shane361
This is the biggest joke of an article I ever seen in my life. Epic Failure
Posted on: February 3rd 2008. Posted by: shane361
I take back what I said..this is an EPIC SUCCESS!! Originally posted on APRIL FOOLS day! HA HA To think I thought someone could be as stupid as to have written this! Good one...got me!
hahahaha
Posted on: August 13th 2007. Posted by: people4peace
this article is a piece of shit. it is 100% wrong.
Posted on: August 10th 2007. Posted by: Lazer
WOW....just wow. fallout boy's music is incredible? have you ever listened to their music? they have no talent at all. i have literally sat down, looked up their tabs, and played it virtually perfectly the first time through. fallout boy sucks. i dont even really like the beatles, but the beatles are better
hahaha
Posted on: July 19th 2007. Posted by: people4peace
hahaha this the funniest article i have ever read. it must be a joke. hahaha FOB will never be as good or better than The Beatles, EVER!! and i think many people will agree.
junk
Posted on: July 19th 2007. Posted by: people4peace
no wonder this site is called readJUNK. this article is JUNK
Posted on: April 14th 2007. Posted by: JohnJaySmith
Now there's an article that needs to be written. Sam the Sham and the Pharoahs > every other group that ever existed.
Posted on: April 14th 2007. Posted by: creatureofwar
I think that Fall Out Boy looks pretty.
Posted on: April 13th 2007. Posted by: XXXSkaPunk
so is this a joke or not?
Posted on: April 11th 2007. Posted by: READmagazine
More like Biggie Smalls > Beatles > Black Eyed Peas > Fall Out Boy > Foo Fighters > Rolling Stones > Beatles
Posted on: April 9th 2007. Posted by: HellofaSandwich
I'd rank them like this: The Beatles > Fall Out Boy > The Turtles > Sam the Sham & the Pharoahs > Blue Magoos > The Rolling Stones
Posted on: April 8th 2007. Posted by: READmagazine
FOB is better than the rolling stones but the BEATLES? NO WAY.
Hey
Posted on: April 7th 2007. Posted by: Lightmare
To everyone who posted here, Happy April Fools! From everyone who didn't post here and me.
Posted on: April 7th 2007. Posted by: creatureofwar
Aww...shit. Today's April Fools Day and we forgot to post something.
Posted on: April 4th 2007. Posted by: XXXSkaPunk
Fudge popsticles tickle my teeth
Posted on: April 4th 2007. Posted by: JohnJaySmith
Watch out, Radioactive Man! The sun is exploding again! ...this is all Fall Out Boy will ever be to me. :\
Posted on: April 4th 2007. Posted by: JohnJaySmith
Oh, and one other thing. MICKEY ROONEY!!
Posted on: April 4th 2007. Posted by: HellofaSandwich
thanx for having the courage to take a bold stand! just like our president, you guys arent afraid of roughling up some feathers with a harsh dose of reality! GO USA and GO FALL OUT BOY!!!
Posted on: April 3rd 2007. Posted by: READmagazine
This so called "Journalism" is a travesty.
Fall Out Boy And The Beatles
Posted on: April 3rd 2007. Posted by: dramaqueen86
ALLRIGHT WITH THE BASHING, ALREADY!!!! >:-( It is 100% true that, although, to be completely honest with you, I have never been too big of a fan of the Beatles, they are still one of the most beloved and influential bands of all time, and can only command the utmost respect for that...But,in my humble opinion, Fall Out Boy now leads at the head of a musical movement that is arguably every bit as revolutionary as the "British Invasion" of the 60`s. In that respect, I believe that whether anyone likes it or not, both bands have already made their way in to Pop culture history, by breaking the artistic molds of their respective days, and something tells me that neither one of them is going ANYWHERE any time soon! ;)
Posted on: April 3rd 2007. Posted by: creatureofwar
The Beatles suck. Fall Out Girl sucks. Posting comments about articles suck. Melted popsicles suck.
Posted on: April 3rd 2007. Posted by: READmagazine
Creature, melted popsicles do in fact suck
Posted on: April 2nd 2007. Posted by: mynameisjosh
i wish the people who read this weren't so stupid. not only did samuh just get incredibly duped (on april fools day), but also admitted that fall out boy was their favorite band. beautiful article
Kids these days
Posted on: April 2nd 2007. Posted by: Archangel
Anyone who doesn't see the drastically humorous irony in this article is a fucking short bus riding nimwit that deserves to listen to Fallout Boy for the remainder of eternity, while having your balls repeatedly beaten with a sack of nails. Humor is a wonderful thing, too bad they don't teach it in those fancy schools these kids are going to nowadays.
10 Reasons Why You're Wrong
Posted on: April 2nd 2007. Posted by: CLNCTRN
10: Why exactly does a reference to a cartoon make their name descriptive and important? 9: The moptop is iconic to the generation and an identifiable hairstyle to the early years of the beatles. Pete's part looks like anything you would see from some d-bag in rural iowa. And that fat dude in the band's balding... eew! 8: John's penis was on the cover of one of the most important albums in the history of popular music. This was significantly more scandalous than homie's cock out when he's cam-whoring. 7: The Internet wasn't a driving force at the time of the Beatles. This argument is not only irrelevant rambling and incoherent. 6: The Beatles collaborated with Ravi Shankar. He is significantly more important than Jay-Z ever has the potential of being. You are also forgetting that Paul McCartney collaborated with Jay-Z... ON A BEATLES SONG! 5: You can not even begin to compare the anti-war efforts of Fall Out Boy and the Beatles. Your argument is "they are against the war and stuff like that." The Beatles were probably the most predominate anti war force in popular culture of their generation. Aside from war they were independently involved with numerous other global political issues, ie the concert for Bangladesh. 4: What the fuck is your justification behind saying that no one gives a fuck about the Beatles? And they didn't sell their music to Michael Jackson. They got fucked over by their label and Michael Jackson bought them when they were up for public auction. 3: You clearly don't have the mental capacity to understand the metaphorical simplicity in a Beatles song. The lyrics to a Beatles song have depth and cultural relevance and take imagination, unlike the childish literalism in a fall out boy song. 2: Umm... excuse me... the beatles did in fact change the world. Fall Out Boy will be insignificant in 10 years. You have a pretty misconstrued definition of our generation if you think we can identify with this music. They write good pop songs, I have yet to see any evidence of them saving popular music. 1: The vast Beatles catalog does in fact have more than 3 or 4 worthwhile songs and is so massive because of their ability to morph over time. The were able to produce albums at such a rapid rate because of their interest in eclectic music styles and willingness to experiment. There is very little progression between fall out boy. It has taken them six years to write the same song over and over again. I can not even believe you are comparing a song as immortal as "All you Need is Love" to a fall out boy song. The message in All you need is love will stay relevant and powerful way after sugar we're going down is forgotten.
10 Reasons Why You're Wrong
Posted on: April 2nd 2007. Posted by: CLNCTRN
10: Why exactly does a reference to a cartoon make their name descriptive and important? 9: The moptop is iconic to the generation and an identifiable hairstyle to the early years of the beatles. Pete's part looks like anything you would see from some d-bag in rural iowa. And that fat dude in the band's balding... eew! 8: John's penis was on the cover of one of the most important albums in the history of popular music. This was significantly more scandalous than homie's cock out when he's cam-whoring. 7: The Internet wasn't a driving force at the time of the Beatles. This argument is not only irrelevant rambling and incoherent. 6: The Beatles collaborated with Ravi Shankar. He is significantly more important than Jay-Z ever has the potential of being. You are also forgetting that Paul McCartney collaborated with Jay-Z... ON A BEATLES SONG! 5: You can not even begin to compare the anti-war efforts of Fall Out Boy and the Beatles. Your argument is "they are against the war and stuff like that." The Beatles were probably the most predominate anti war force in popular culture of their generation. Aside from war they were independently involved with numerous other global political issues, ie the concert for Bangladesh. 4: What the fuck is your justification behind saying that no one gives a fuck about the Beatles? And they didn't sell their music to Michael Jackson. They got fucked over by their label and Michael Jackson bought them when they were up for public auction. 3: You clearly don't have the mental capacity to understand the metaphorical simplicity in a Beatles song. The lyrics to a Beatles song have depth and cultural relevance and take imagination, unlike the childish literalism in a fall out boy song. 2: Umm... excuse me... the beatles did in fact change the world. Fall Out Boy will be insignificant in 10 years. You have a pretty misconstrued definition of our generation if you think we can identify with this music. They write good pop songs, I have yet to see any evidence of them saving popular music. 1: The vast Beatles catalog does in fact have more than 3 or 4 worthwhile songs and is so massive because of their ability to morph over time. The were able to produce albums at such a rapid rate because of their interest in eclectic music styles and willingness to experiment. There is very little progression between fall out boy. It has taken them six years to write the same song over and over again. I can not even believe you are comparing a song as immortal as "All you Need is Love" to a fall out boy song. The message in All you need is love will stay relevant and powerful way after sugar we're going down is forgotten.
Posted on: April 2nd 2007. Posted by: READmagazine
CLNCTRN, exactly how dumb r u? All YOu Need Is Love is a good song?! That song has 10 words total in it, they just repeat them in different ways. Stupid hippies couldn't even put out a song with words more than one sillable.
:|
Posted on: April 1st 2007. Posted by: samuh
honestly, what in gods name where you thinkning when you wrote this? i love fall out boy, they're my favorite band. but you've got to be partially insane if you think they're better than the beatles. a lot of bands, like fall out boy, probably wouldnt be around if it weren't for the beatles. and, "You never saw Paul or Ringo blog about their relationships and touring and people they care about." what the fuck. THERE WAS NO INTERNET FOR HIM TO BLOG ON. and the whole thing about the beatles singing about war and killing people? uhm, hate to break it to you, but that's what alot of songs were about back then because that's what was going on. just like now, fall out boy talks about alot of things because that's what's popular-- although they do sing it better than a hell of a lot of the bands out now. you need to realize what you're talking about before you write an article on it and post it on the internet for the whole word to see; and for the world to see what an imbecile you are. :|
Posted on: April 1st 2007. Posted by: READmagazine
Technically there WAS an internet in the 60s, but it wasn't as big as it is now. But the Beatles could've still reached out more to their fans. But anyway, both bands suck, so I don't care.
 
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