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Batman Begins Sucks - How Hollywood Destroyed A Cult Masterpiece

Starring: Christian Bale, Michael Caine, Liam Neeson, Katie Holmes, Gary Oldman, Cillian Murphy, Tom Wilkinson, Rutger Hauer, Ken Watanabe, Morgan Freeman
Written By: David S. Goyer, Christopher Nolan
Directed By: Christopher Nolan
Batman leaped onto the pages of comic books, and into our hearts, in the early 1940s, beginning with his quiet appearance in a little-known graphic novel called Detective Comics. His origins are unlike any other superhero - instead of being in a lab accident or born with mutations, Bruce Wayne was an ordinary guy with billions of dollars and a cave.

After seeing his father get killed by a robber, Bruce decides to channel his anger to fight crime. Using his wads of money and with the help of his friend Robbin, they helped protect Gotham, a Chicago-like city full of dark alleys, corrupt police commissioners, and super villains.

The comics were dark, but also very fun, and that fun was accurately portrayed on tv in the 1960s. Batman the tv show was a cult hit, and while the effects weren't that great, it truly showed Batman as he was originally intended - as a super detective who wasn't afraid to get into fights, but was ultimately a really nice family man with a good sense of humor. After a couple of awful and boring movies with Michael "Snowman Jack" Keaton as the Dark Crusader, things got back on track with Batman & Robbin and Batman Forever, but stunning special effects, refreshing acting, and cool new villains couldn't save them from large plot holes and a poor box office.

Now Batman Begins is out, and it takes it all a giant step back. Instead of making a fun family movie, Batman Begins is the darkest one yet, and light years away from the cult comic. Based on Batman's origin story, the movie relives Bruce Wayne - this time as a child - as he watches both (yes, both) his parents get killed. For some reason, that leads him to go to Tibet or something and learn martial arts (umm… okaaay), making enemies along the way.

He then decides out of the blue to become Batman, but instead of Alfred making him his costume and weapons, he hires Samuel L. Jackson to do it for him. Now, I'm not a stickler for consistancy with the comic books, but this was really out of left field, and to me smacked of Hollywood trying James Bondify Batman.

Worst of all, Batman now drives some lame giant army tank instead of his normal Batmobile (which was sort of like a Lincoln Towncar with a racing stripe, tail fins and booster jets). This ugly Bat-Hummer doesn't really do much, and the CGI for it looked terrible.

Batman himself doesn't have the stocky, square-jawed appearance that we all recognize, but is played by the thin guy from Memento. However, that's understandable since this movie takes place in Batman's earlier years. Still, the casting makes about as much sense as Nick Cage as Superman. His acting makes Keaton look like Shakespiere, as he plays up the "darkness" of the character to ridiculous levels.

As for the story - well, it's slow but decent. The villains don't have the fun zaniness of the Joker or Mr. Riddles or the Pengiun and they're even a little scary. (Maybe next time they'll pit Batman against Hellraiser!) But it kept me entertained, even though as a hardcore fan of the comic books, I was disappointed with their interpretation.

I would say that the average joe will probably love Batman Begins, but real fans will be surprised by the direction this movie has taken. Hopefully, though, they'll make a Batman movie that really portrays him as the fun, gadget-packed cult character we all know and love.
RATING & SUMMARY:
Favorite Scenes:The scenes at Ra's Al Ghul's place, the tank/cop chase, the creation of the bat cave and other batman stuff, when batman's backup arrived, scarecrow getting a taste of his own medicine.
Rating: PG-13
Running Time: 141 mins
Reviewer: Adamo el Guapo
 
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Comments:
BATMAN BEGINS...AND BEGINS...AND BEGINS...AND BEGINS...AND BEGINS.
Posted on: July 1st 2008. Posted by: ComicBookWorm
Are you saying you prefer seeing a bunch of cops and water main guys making stupid jokes for 10 minutes (If anything in this movie could vaguely be construed as acting), rather than a dramatic fight scene and Bruce's parents getting killed in 5 seconds?
Another off-base review from the mouth breather
Posted on: March 8th 2007. Posted by: azaggg
Let me get this straight...you prefer the gay-ass, panty-wearing, painted-eyebrows-on-the-mask, goofy-ass disco themed, Adam West version of Batman? Jesus Freaking Christ. You never read ANY of the comics, did you? Batman was always dark and gritty ( at least, for the era he was) and the 1960s TV show made him into some kind of flaming homo detective acrobat. Things got back to basics in the 80s and 90s, and Batman was dark and gritty again. The Keaton movies were truer to form than the TV show ever was (the TV show was a cartoon on crack). Then things got goofy again with the Clooney and Kilmer Batmen. I mean, molded plastic nipples on the outside of his costume????? WTF!?!?! That you would actually prefer the Adam West Batman to the Batman Begins version...it's just sad. Batman Begins is Batman the way he always was in the comics, and always should have been.
 
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