What does your parents think about your act?
They like it but wish there were more incest references.
How was it being Lewis Black’s bitch in jail?
Fine, he put his aggressive finger in my bum and wiggled it like he does on the Daily Show.
What are Opie & Anthony doing these days? Temping?
Enjoying the steady cash flow and waiting to go back on.
What was your favorite moment on the Opie and Anthony show?
Fucking a girl over the toilet back by the offices.
What’s the deal with Tough Crowd with Colin Quinn? When’s it coming back and will you be on there offending more people..hopefully?
March, and I will be on some episodes.
Have you gotten any complaints about your comments on Tough Crowd or with your stand up in general?
Only people who’ve paid to see it because it stinks.
Have you ever seen Colin Quinn get drunk and start sobbing about his life?
no, but he does get drunk and rape me.
How’s your Dad, Don Rickles doing? *elbow, elbow*
He’s fine *good natured tussle*
Do you think Ozzy mania is going way overboard? Isn’t Kelly Osbourne a spoiled Brat?
No and no
What type of music do you like besides Ozzy and Black Sabbath? Do you like punk rock or ska at all?
I only like ozzy and sabbath, with some old kiss thrown in to straighten me out.
What’s your take on censorship? Particularly radio censorship?
How much are hookers nowadays?
A hundred bucks, unless they’re trannys, then they’re fifty.
Do you regret anything you did in High School?
Yes, blowing the entire junior class
What’s funnier, watching a retard with no arms trying to pick up something or an old lady getting hit by a car?
Watching an old lady with no arms get hit by a car driven by a retard
Who influenced you more – Rodney Dangerfield, Andrew Dice Clay, or Benito Mussolini?
My biggest comic influences are Rich Vos’ hands
Have any good groupie stories?
No, I am an ugly nothing
What’s your take on this upcoming war?
I love it. Go team
Got any plugs? Come on, I know you do.
Only Baltimore in March. hudla hudla (The gig is the Baltimore Improv March 6-9)