Record Label: Hopeless Records
Genre: Emo
Band Link: link
Buy on Amazon.com link

Hello. Are you a man, and yet you wish you had a vagina? Well, we have the product for you.

Why spend tens of thousands of dollars on costly, invasive surgery, followed by weeks of painful recovery, when you could simply pick up Amber Pacific’s Truth in Sincerity? Its polished power pop rock sound will painlessly sterilize your testosterone while the emo vocals flesh out your chest until you too have womanly breasteses.

But what about the penis, you ask? Well, if you listen to Amber Pacific twice a day for… well… a day, your penis will fade until it has disappeared. That is the Amber Pacific Promise!

Call within the next 15 minutes to also receive Amber Pacific’s Castration Kit, which includes liner notes to their lyrics and sheet music for their string arrangements! Act now! Operators are standing by!

Bottom Line: Actually, they’re pretty good. But fuck em, they’re emo.
Notable Tracks:
Overall Rating: