We All Have Hooks For Hands “The Pretender”

Album Reviews | May 26th, 2007

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Record Label: Afternoon Records
Genre: Indie
Band Link: link
Buy on Amazon.com link

We All Have Hooks For Hands should typify everything I hate about this type of indie.

Long-ass retarded name? Check. More than five band members playing music that sounds like three could manage? Yep (there’s nine here). Softly played nontraditional instruments and high-pitched yarling in a dainty, hip-for-being-lame manner? Yes, yes, yes.

But. But. But.. I kinda liked them.

I don’t know, maybe I’m getting soft. Maybe the exposure to all these northwestern clearing-in-the-forest-jamboree folk-indie type of bands have beaten down my resistance to pretentiousness. Or maybe I’m drunk.

Or maybe they just do it well. Songs are short and snappy, so even if you get irritated by the vocals (as on “Elvis MF Christ”), it’s over before you want to kill yourself. Instrumentation is passable with adequately restrained usage of keys, horns, and violin.

Sorry, I’ve just listened to it to the end and now I’m thoroughly sick of this band and its genre again. I spoke too soon and generously. I’ll leave the first half of the review as a peace offering to the trucker-cap crowd, but let’s lay the cards on the table: this big-ensemble folky indie stuff is outrageously irritating and combines the worst aspects of indie hipsters with granola-eating communal hippies. This shit just killed my buzz.

Bottom Line: Somewhat decent for a pretentious genre.
Notable Tracks: Jumpin Jean-luc, On & On
Overall Rating: