I was scoping out the $30 official tour t-shirts, when I spotted her: a girl. At a Rush concert. I charmed her into an interview to learn how someone with two X chromosomes could appreciate the female-repelling rockitude of Rush.
Unfortunately, I didn’t have my camera on me, and so I fear this interview will be likened to stories of Loch Ness monster spottings. But I assure you, she was as real as the voices in my head. Read on in wonderment:
You are definitely a girl, right?
With all the requisite girly parts?
I’m sorry for asking but you do know you’re a rare sight? You’re like the four-leaf clover of rock!
How did you get into Rush?
Well, my older cousin was always into Rush, but I think it was a combination of hearing a song on the radio and having one of my guy friends always talk about them. My first CD of theirs that I got was Counterparts, then Moving Pictures, and it went on from there. Of course I got into their older stuff too. I have all their CDs now. I’m more into their older stuff.
What’s your favorite album?
Umm… (pauses) I guess Fly By Night or 2112. But you know what? I’m really into Grace Under Pressure right now. Oh, and Presto. Presto is very underrated.
Presto is one of my favorites. What songs are you hoping to hear tonight?
Well, honestly, I saw the set list online. Between the Wheels and Digital Man should be interesting…
Dude, spoiler! Do you feel uncomfortable being around so many dudes?
There are some lame people here and there but a lot of people are cool. No one’s bothered me.
Are you getting stares of disbelief?
(laughs) Yes, a few. But no one’s bothered me. I don’t think Rush fans are about, you know, picking up girls and stuff. I’ve been to metal shows where I’ve been harassed nonstop. It sucks.
Are the guys here giving you a wide berth and being all respectful and crap because you’re like an endangered species?
I think it’s either that Rush fans are really nice or that they’re dorky.
Are there any benefits to being a girl at a Rush concert?
Yes – no lines for the bathroom! (laughs) Seriously, the women’s room is EMPTY. I’ve never seen that before.
What is it about Rush that appeals to you as a woman?
Oh, wow. Uhh… I don’t know. The music is great… The lyrics are smart and more meaningful than other bands…. Oh, and Geddy Lee is cute. And I guess they’re appealing because they’re not trying to be tough or anything. They’re pretty real. And they don’t act like rock stars – like, you don’t see them having sex with groupies.
If you hung out with Rush after a show, what do you think you guys would do?
I don’t know… probably Scrabble! (laughs) Geddy and I would give each other hair tips! (laughs)
(Runs out of questions) Umm…
Are we done? I should get to my seat.
NO! STAY WITH ME AND MARRY ME!!
Okay, last question… how come other girls aren’t as cool as you?
(laughs) Maybe I’m not as cool as them! (laughs) Nah, they’re just lame.