Starring The Pixies (duh)
Written By:
Directed By: Steven Cantor, Matthew Galkin
Studio: MVD Visual
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I get it already. The Pixies are important. And people like them. But if you look closely at your nearest DVD store, you’ll find that there are already nine different Pixies DVDs, filled with concerts, music videos, music videos culled from the concerts, and puppet shows. But wait! There’s no ‘behind the scenes’ documentary! Hey Pixies! How could you leave your fans without one for so long! I mean, you had a long enough vacation!

So anyways, this crapshoot of a film is called loudQUIETloud, which might be the most obnoxiously pretentiously awful title I’ve ever heard. I get it, it’s in capitals when it says quiet! BLOWS MY MIND! And this is a film about the Pixies right? Except that it’s not about them. It features them talking, playing, masturbating, but it’s not really about them. There’s no background information, context, validation. In fact, by documentary standards, these filmmakers should be deported. Or fail out of DeVry’s film program. That’s why I decided that this film should be aboot the Pixies. Aboot in the sense that my buddy from Manitoba talks aboot things; he knows all aboot the time he got so smashed but he’s never able to describe it because he’ll start talking aboot something else, like say the time he got hit in the head with a hockey stick (which may well explain why he doesn’t ever explain anything). So in other words, this film is aboot the Pixies in that unless you KNOW the Pixies like I know my Manitoban buddy, you really don’t care or care to know what’s going on.

I’m one of the only people in the world that doesn’t care much for the Pixies. I don’t dislike them per se, but it’s not like I listen to their albums with any regularity, nor do I ever desire to here them except for the odd drunken moment when Here Comes Your Man is playing at a bar. So for someone like me to watch this film, clearly only targeted at indie rock nerds with too much money and a desire to know whether or not Frank Black cast any doubt upon his own talents (he didn’t, by the way), or if Kim Deal is still hot (actually I don’t know if she ever was).

Quite frankly, there was no need for the Pixies to reunite. They were influential, but their sound is already outdated and uninteresting these days. They’re old and their live show is nothing to write home about. If anything, their reunion is as obnoxious as this DVD release and film. Because had they not reunited, indie rock nerds would have still been scouring the internet on message boards looking for rare bootlegs and original pressings of Doolittle. Now there’s too much Pixies crap on the market.

Let this be a message to bands and labels who put out films about bands. Unless you put money and effort to make something worth watching a la Stop Making Sense or The Last Waltz, please, please stop putting out such tripe. Or at least just give it out for free. Thank Goldblum I didn’t have to pay for my copy.

Features:

Audio:
English

Video:
1.78:1 Aspect Ratio
Color

Subtitles:
Close-captioned

Favorite Scenes: I liked them better when they weren’t played by over-the-hill forty-somethings.
Rating: NR
Running Time: 120 minutes
Extras Rating:
Overall Rating: