Date: May 28th 2004
Venue: The Chance, Poughkeepsie, NY
I wasn’t even going to see Gwar this weekend, I was going to see some show next door with my Friend’s brother’s band, Days Lasting.
The band got there late and wasn’t going on til midnight so I wasn’t too happy about that. So Gwar was playing next door instead and they do put on a creative show so.. My brother and I said what the hell, we haven’t seen them since ’97 with Mephiskapheles and 99 Cents, so we bought tickets and went inside.
Some band was already playing, they sounded pretty cool. The singer was making scary looking faces and pounding his hands and mic at his hand and looking tough. Shit, the guy could probably crush me like a bug. We met up with our friend Dumbass who was at the show, and he was surprised to see us there. He was right in the middle of the club, and wearing shitty clothes to get Gwar ink/blood all over him. I wasn’t going to stand there because I’m a pussy, and also I just bought these new jeans that day so I wasn’t going for that. My bro and I wandered in the back of the club and watch the bands from there. The second band was Bad Acid or something like that and they sucked monkey balls.
At least the first band was good and thankfully only 2 supporting bands in front of Gwar. Our friend from the other show came over to watch Gwar with us, since he never saw them before. Gwar took forever to come on because they have all that shit to get ready but it’s worth the wait. Gwar puts on the BEST shows EVER! They are so creative with the costumes, the choreographed fights, and the way they kill people on stage. Gwar came out and smoke filled the Chance, and the costumes looked awesome among the smoke.
I knew some old songs that they played like “Ham on a Bone” “Crack in the Egg” and “Maggots”, those are some of my favorites. Probably my favorite Gwar songs is “Saddam-a Go Go” “Death Pod” “and “Rock n Roll Never Felt So Good.” They didn’t play those though. This set, they seemed to be more of a metal jam band, and would kill people and not sing songs. Their first victim was Courtney Love and her aborted baby, and they were swinging her baby around and it was hilarious. They ripped her face off and blood shot out into the crowd. Then came out Mike Tyson, this short guy in a stocky suit and one of the slave roadies tried to fight him, but he was much too powerful. That’s until Oderus came over and used his gigantic sword on his hands and chest. Then more blood shot out into the crowd.
President Dubya Bush, John Kerry, Osama were among the other victims of the Gwar set and I just laughed my balls off everytime a limb or head got chopped off. For Dubya, they had him tied up and he whipped out his gray looking penis and was stroking it, until the slaves and Oderus ripped out his organs in his stomach. Everytime a hand or limb got chopped off, Oderus would stick the shooting blood/paint/ink into his face and open his mouth. I wonder if that stuff is okay to drink? The best thing though was Oderus chopping off the top of the Pope’s head and then proceeding to skullfuck him. Ahh, gotta love a Gwar show right? haha. Overall, they played some new songs that were okay (new album comes out October), and played some older songs I knew. Gwar puts on the most creative and entertaining shows on this planet. If you haven’t seen them yet, do so. You’ll be cheering and laughing like crazy the whole set. And if you do go, be sure to wear shitty clothes because you will get stuff on you if you aren’t in the back of the club.