Millions Of Women Are Waiting To Meet You
Book Reviews | Nov 3rd, 2007
Author: Sean Thomas
Publisher: Da Capo Press
Genre: Memoir
Pages: 300
Retail Price: 9.99
Buy on Amazon.com link
Sean Thomas, a late 30s-something single guy, is charged by his employer, a men’s health magazine, to write a piece on internet dating. The setup is humorous and his navigation of the online world and subsequent blind dates is done well. I particularly liked the beginning when Thomas obsesses over crafting the perfect profile and emails to potential dates – it’s chock full of cutting and funny observations about the internet, along with frankly showcasing men’s own insecurities in the dating world. These early bits are written amusingly and cutely self-deprecating, kind of like a guy’s version of chick lit, but also easy to relate to.
But the book takes a turn and becomes a narcissistic relationship memoir. Spliced with and in-between his internet dates are uncomfortably long and detailed flashbacks to his offline sexual history from youth to adulthood. They’re connected loosely to the present narrative about online dating, but are clearly a way for him to boastfully (in a faux-modest way) share his sexual conquests.
It gets unsavory and sometimes unintentionally embarrassing. He relates everything from dating a teenager (when he’s in his 30s), years-long erectile dysfunction, spanking fetishes, romps with young sex workers in Thailand, severe porn addiction (which lands him in the hospital), a threesome (the uncool kind), abortions, miscarriages, paternity tests, and many other unnecessary things that are tangential to the narrative.
He tries to tie these flashbacks in with the present narrative in various ways, least successfully through eye-rolling pop-psych and evolutionary biology theories. But it’s transparent that this is an airing out of laundry we don’t need to see, nor care about, and is truly distracting from what’s really interesting – the misadventures of a middle-aged and non-tech-savvy guy attempting to find love in the digital age.
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